As if she were my own

There are events in life that will stick with you forever. Marriages, births, deaths, funny moments. Four years ago today our best friends welcomed their first daughter into the world. This birth will stay with me forever, not only because of the beautiful child that we have with us today but also because we were expecting our first child. So this delivery was my eye opener or actually Chris' on what we could expect. Forgive me for those that don't know this story it may be graphic. We ate dinner and then decided we would go over to the hospital you see Jess has been in labor like 2 days so surely this child would arrive soon! We get the phone call a we were getting out of our truck at the hospital, she's here! We ran straight into the proud papa in the hallway, he took this moment to describe his daughter's birth to my poor husband. So apparently it kind of looks like when you shoot a deer in the heart. Sorry Jess I know you hate that story! At this point Chris is seeing stars, his mouth has hit the floor, eyes wide open looking slighy nauseated he turns around and tells me he doesn't think he can do thiss! Thanks proud papa I now have to spend my next 3 months convincing my husband he's strong enough to be at his son's delivery. All joking aside this little girl has changed the lives of those she's met. She's beautiful, intelligent and humorous. Happy Birthday and we live you Josie.

Holidays

Did we have Christmas? How about Thanksgiving? I can't believe it's already January 19, 2010; my how time flies! I am proud to say that I cooked Thanksgiving lunch, went way overboard and sent lots of food home with Uncle Wade! We were supposed to spend Thanksgiving with Chris' side of the family, his parents and aunts in Decatur, but Chris was on call all week and I'm not quite crazy enough to drive 3 hours in a car alone with 2 small children. Maybe in a few years! Chris did work Thanksgiving day but was home around lunch and we had a nice quiet, overzealous Thanksgiving with just the 7 of us, plus 1 friend. I also attempted to take pictures of the kids for our Christmas card. We went to Bass Pro to see Santa, who was very busy and Liey was very angry that we left, see photo above! The day after Thanksgiving Chris and I went shopping. We had an absolute blast with each other, we were so on the same page that day, spent lots of money and I truley believed that we were done Christmas shopping when we came home. But according to my pocket book I was far from done, you will see pics of what Santa left, it's so hard not to spoil them. So once again Christmas was filled with fun and joy and busyness. Liey sang in the tree lighting ceremony with his preschool. He was hilarious, he sang and cried, afterwards he told me he was so scared. But he did really well and I am so proud. The week of Christmas arrives and we spend one night with our dear friends exchanging gifts with each other. Well Mr. Li not missing a beat tells me that the gift Uncle Joe & Aunt Jessica has just given him is not what he wanted for Christmas! He graciously repeats this statement numerous times. Now I must explain that the entire time he's telling us this isn't what he wanted for Christmas he is playing with the gift, to the point where he is so distracted he doesn't even realize when the girls go take a bath. Needless to say I was slightly embarrassed, Oh Well at least he's only 3. Christmas Eve arrives and we head to church for communion services, Elias explains that Santa isn't going to come and see him because he didn't clean his room. So the elder members of our church look horrified and explain to him that he shouldn't have anything to worry about. This brings me to my dilema. I grew up with Santa, my husband grew up with Santa, but I'm finding it very difficult to allow Santa to infiltrate our Christmas. I mean how confusing is it. We celebrate this holiday because Jesus was born (and it's Poppy's birthday-that's a whole nother blog!) but then this big guy in a red suit drops off presents? HMMM-I'm even confused. Hopefully we filled our month with enough Christian activities that the true meaning of Christmas stuck.

I love you Liey and Sweet Pea

I don't have skeletons in my closet as some would say. I never hide anything about my life and I tend to even tell some of my more personal moments as it could always relate to someone else's life. Reading other peoples indescretions, actually let's say moments of truth has gotten me through some of the more tougher aspects of my life. I've shared before about my previous miscarriages but right now I'm going to share what I went through emotionally. Yes I can be emotional just ask my husband, he's seen it. A very private side of me just because it's a side I don't tend to share with many, that's just me. I have experienced two miscarriages. One was tougher than the other for the simple fact that it occurred at 12 weeks and I had a D & C performed. I left the hospital that day, thankful that I had a son waiting for me at home but at the same time I questioned God. Why would he do this to anyone? Why would he allow his own to go through this pain? Why when I can provide an awesome home for one of his miracles? Unfortunately I will probably never get an answer to any of these questions, at least not on this earth. You see my four children, yes I consider myself to have four, my husband and I prayed for, cried for, and have experienced heartbreak for. You never get an answer that you want and even if that answer does come it never takes the pain away from the experience. Now since I have experienced such heartbreak, how does this play into my life? I hold a baby and it is a miracle, a blessing, a true gift from God, even if it isn't my own. I can say that my miscarriages have molded me to be the parent that I am. Am I a better parent than you? No. But I am a parent who doesn't get stressed over the small stuff! So what if my kids decided to shed their clothes and go swimming in the wheel barrel in the middle of winter. Just dry em off and bring em back in. I do not yell at my children, I have lost my cool a time or two yes, but I always gather it instantly and apologize to them. Don't get me wrong we discipline but not everything needs to be disciplined. My children are sweet, energetic, loving, and for the most part mind their manners. And my only goal in life, other than to teach the word of God, is to enjoy them. Because every time I look at their picture or see their smiling face, I remember the days of crying, heartbreak and sadness that my husband and I went through together in order to bring these two babies into this world. Each experience was different but each experience has made us the parents we are. I will never understand why people have to loose a child regardless of if he/she was just conceived or whether they are 40. All I know is it has been worth the heartache, the crying, oh and can I say the money to be able to raise and know God's most precious blessing.

18 month pictures

Li wanted his picture made-but he refused to smile.

By far this is my favorite and so her.

I took both kids to have their pictures made today. My goals was Sweet Pea's 18 month and then Christmas pics if she cooperated. I knew before we started that she was going to be uncooperative but she did give us a few good pictures. Li wanted his picture made but refused to smile, it still turned out adorable. However I still have to go back and get Christmas pictures-not looking forward to that but I always love the end result.

Seen and Heard:

Just a small note about our Sweet Pea growing up. She can now frequently say "Come on" with vigor i might add! She also has "Here Ya Go" down pat.

Halloween

I'm really glad Halloween is now over but we did have weeks of fun! We went to the pumpkin patch, mostly for pictures but we ended up with 4 pumpkins at home!

We also went to 3 trunk or treats, 1 fall festival, and an evening of trick or treating in the Luckie's neighborhood. Needless to say we have lots and lots of candy that will be making it's way to my work! Li was a handsome fireman and Sweet Pea was a lady bug. When we went to trick or treat in the Luckie's neighborhood, Li gets out of our car and says he is going to scare Mr. Brad and he puts on a werewolf mask that Chris brought with us. Needless to say Li ended up being the one scared. Mr. Brad came out of the bushes-thank Jesus i knew he was there otherwise we both would have been scared! Li told Brad he couldn't wear that in the house! And ever since he's been slightly skiddish of the dark? Hopefully it'll pass, he drew a dark picture of a monster at church today-of all places, maybe we left it at church!

Just my size.

I want this one!

Nanna's girl!

Enjoying the jumpies at the pumpkin patch

The handsome fireman.

My cute little lady bug.

Enjoying her candy!

Playhouse Disney

It has definitely been a while since I've posted hence the back to back I'm now having to do! We went to playhouse disney for sweet pea's sake, she loves mickey mouse clubhouse, but we all enjoyed ourselves. I'd be lying if I didn't say this: I was slightly disappointed, however mommy was expected a bigger reaction from my two children. On the way home I asked Li if he had fun and he told me he did. I said why didn't you smile. His response: I don't like smiling! I asked well what was sweet pea's problem. Big brother responded her was scared. Chris asked him if she told him that and he said no, I just know! Such a good big brother. Wish he would have told us that so we could have comforted those fears!

See what I mean-he does not look thrilled to be there!

Bribed with a toy?

Checking out Minnie Mouse.

MMMM I love Minnie!